Waking Up...

Just this year(2012) before I left the Big Island and came to Maui, I went through an amazing personal transformation. To be brief, my relationship had ended and after purging myself of all that I hadn't been able to say before he left, I started reading "Handbook to Higher Consciousness" and recognized that I had been living from my lower three chakras. I went to some friends at space market and told them that I wanted to be in my heart. They performed their "magic" and I was left in neutral for about a month. The second time I went back to ask what was going on; that I knew I wasn't in my heart, I was told to surrender to my higher self and that when I went to bed that night to "melt". So I did. I surrendered, out loud, telling myself that I gave up, that I give up control and that I wanted to be in my heart. The next day, I was slightly different. The only way to describe it is to say that I was still "me", but all of me was on the surface. There wasn't any part of me hiding anymore. It was about noticing what wasn't there and what was different. I began to notice subtle changes about myself. I had already done a LOT of inner work so this shift in me has stuck. I am now in a "refinement" process of my emotions. I still may get irritated or even annoyed but I own it right away and find what it is I need to accept in myself that quells the irritation or annoyance. It's all about just loving who you are with all of the things you don't like. That's all I did (really). Throughout the years, many times it looked like me going outside of myself to answers and for help. I can see now that all I or anyone else needs to do is just love what is there. Loving all the parts of ourselves that we pushed aside while we were children is what caused our pain to begin with. Accepting them back is the key to becoming whole again and makes it possible to STAY in one's heart space.
I AM the change I wish to see in the world!