I suggest you read the past entries I have made about my interaction with a man I'm calling River. It's mostly about how he triggered all my relationship issues with our interaction. This will get you up to speed.
I knew when I met him that there was something "special" about him. When we were together, just he and I, he felt like family. The only way I had of describing how I felt when I was with him was it felt like being Home. It felt like when I was a child and I went to visit my favorite relatives; my Great Grandparents. I would walk into their house and I'd immediately felt at ease. I felt like I could be myself which was huge for me coming from an abusive parent.
I made some mistakes with River; giving him "help" when he hadn't asked for it and, while I fell in Love with the positive attributes I found in him, I also saw where he could learn more about himself, and improve on his behavior.😞
I could not help wanting to take care of him. It became a near obsession for me with him; especially after we broke up. I could not shake my need to communicate with him even when he didn't want me to. I had a strong desire to "right the wrongs" and clear up the miscommunications we had between us and to be properly understood; all in vain.😖
I asked my unseen Guides and Angels for help; needing to know just what the hell was going on and why I could not shake this incessant need I had to help and take care of him.
I got my answers in the form of a few emails. I had been to a business that offered floats in a magnesium pool; basically a sensory deprivation tank. I hadn't been in a few years and the business had been taken over by a new owner and she was offering some discounts on new services she was offering as well as a meet and greet "open house". I missed the open house event, however, I called her and talked with her over the phone. After telling her what I was going through with myself, she said she wanted to do a past life session with me.
After about a month, I did the session with her and I went back to a time somewhere in the 1800's in Australia where I was a 45 yo Aboriginal Man and my twin Sister was Autistic and was River.
I was a Blacksmith and also in charge of taking care of my Sister because our parents were dead and all we had was each other.
Because of a stupid mistake I made in shoeing a horse, I ended up in jail for a few days, my Sister wandered off looking for me and drowned in a Lake.😢
When asked by my guide in the session what message there was for me, all I was told by my Sister was to "take care of my family".
That made some sense but not completely since River and I were no longer together and there was some friction between us.
A few days after I got hit with the putter in the chest, I received another email from a channel on YouTube that I follow offering guidance on how to dissolve contracts! I knew I had to listen to this prerecorded interview of the woman who was going to do the workshop. To my joy and amazement, she actually shared the practice in the introductory video and I did it along with her.
It worked! I discovered that there had been an agreement from that lifetime to take care of my Sister for our Parents. I was able to dissolve that contract, see it burning up in my mind's eye and actually feel relief wash over me as the overwhelming feelings that I had had to take care of River left me!😂
I still have a need to communicate with him that he's blocking right now because he wants to "work on" his relationship. There is still this festering wound that he is holding onto because he chose to sweep whatever issue he has with me "under the rug" instead of talking things out with me. I still have many unanswered questions myself arising from the fact that I never got the whole truth from him and didn't know at the time what questions I needed to ask him to GET the whole truth.
I hope someday in the not-too-distant-future that we can come together to talk out our issues with each other so that we can have the REAL friendship that we were meant to have.💞
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