14 June, 2018

Doing "the work"

This topic will be easy to write about because I have lots of experience with not wanting to do "the work", whatever it was.  lol

My most profound moment with realizing that I didn't want to do it was when it was pointed out to me by an asian man whom I went to see here in Boulder.  (over 10 years ago)  It was an introduction to his workshop that I attended and I was waiting to ask him a question at the end.  I don't even remember what my question was, what the workshop was about or even what his name was, I just remember asking my question and then he flat-out told me, "because you don't want to do the work."  I was floored!  I felt shock ripple through my body.  I was astounded at the ease with which he told me, without judgment and so casually.  I didn't know what to say so I simply left.  

I am amazed at how a simple statement of truth can affect us so profoundly!  Part of my shock was related to the realization that he was right and I was able to admit it!  

It wasn't until a few years ago, in looking back, that I realized that I had had a history scattered with many times of not wanting to do work.  It didn't matter what "the work" was whether it was doing dishes or doing my "inner work".  

That shifted when I decided I'd had enough of feeling like shit... I was depressed, had no job for over 2 years and was struggling to pay rent, take care of my son and also struggling with my self.  It wasn't until I got back on my feet and felt better that I started getting the intuitive thoughts that I wanted and needed a better relationship with my lower, ego self.  

 I think it was just making the decision to have a better relationship with me that opened the door, so to speak, to finding different modalities to try until I found IFS.  IFS, by far, has had the most profound effect as it's based in self love and finding the love within you to share with your ego self.

I would say that ALL of the modalities I tried are valid and work, it just boiled down to what kind of work I was attracted to do and what worked for me.  Byron Katies "The Work" was good and help one to accept responsibility for what is.  I also did "Journey Work" by Brandon Bays who has become popular in the UK.  I've done EFT or "tapping" which does work, however, I found it to be more of a "bandaid" temporary solution rather than something that actually gets to the heart of trauma.  And that's what it's about, really.  Getting to the heart of trauma to heal it.  Journey work was OK but I knew there was a better solution that wouldn't necessitate re-experiencing my trauma all over again as what is required in Journey work.  

I also changed my name and I've written about that.  That has also had a profound effect although it has taken years to realize some of the subtle results.   

I notice now, more than ever, that not wanting to "do the work" is a major theme going on with most people that aren't doing their own inner work.  It manifests as not wanting to do other kinds of work.  As thoughts create reality, everything from the inside is reflected in our outer lives.  

I have become rather skilled at seeing what is going on with others as I listen to them and hear about what they are going through.  I can backtrack to the thoughts they may be having just by listening to what come out of their mouth from the language and expressions they use; what is going on with their bodies and the events they are experiencing.  

Our body is always listening to us and it's important that we drop certain expressions that we use like "pain in the ass"... do you really want hemorrhoids?  lol  Another is "pain in the neck", "losing" weight - what we lose we generally want to find again, yes?  There are many others.  Think about it!  

We are always "programming" ourselves  as well with the thoughts we think and what we say.  What we say is our "spell".  This is where "spelling" comes from... arranging letters by their vibration to create "words" that we say as an incantation.  We don't even think about these things.  Laurel Airica is one woman who has discovered some of the secrets about words and what they really mean.  I have learned some of this also from learning the Science of Characteristics.  Read the post about that.  It is related to me changing my name.

Anyway, back to the subject... basically, when I decided I was ready to do my own inner work, I became open to doing all kinds of other work.  Doing the dishes was no longer an issue.  Cooking my own meals was no longer an issue like it used to be, doing housework etc.  I realized that I was willing to do all kinds of things I was never willing to do before.  I think when I was a kid, the word "work" became a "bad" word.  If we don't like the work we have to do in school, school can be the catalyst.  There are many different triggers for work becoming a "bad" thing.  

If you find that you also do not like to "work", when you find that path that "works" for you and you are inspired to do it, it will change everything.😉💖💪

There is SO much more to write about but it is important that you delve into anything that inspires you yourself.


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