I want to be DONE!

I dreamt of him for the first time in months last night.  I watched one of his movies last night.  

I have heard some rather disturbing news that I hope is not true... he is an actor (now) that I know from a past life in Atlantis that I have confirmation of from multiple sources.  He is on a list of celebrities that have been "taken out" by the white hats as "satanists".  I have a hard time believing it because of our connection and who he has been as well as how he is seen in Hollywood as one of the "nicest" people there.  

I was overwhelmed with sadness when I woke up... I was still dreaming lucidly when I became aware of being back in my body.  The last thing I remember was looking directly into his right eye with so much love for him and being aware that he accepted my love...

I think I'm upset (if it's true he's gone from the physical realm) because it means I'll never get to meet him here in the flesh.  I am aware that we still have work together.  I guess that means it will be just energetically?  I wonder if he will take another physical body once we finish out this particular cycle ascending into the 5th density of physical reality. (OK...🙄 this part of the post is related to the one titled "To Be or Not To Be... lol"  If you're wondering who this is... it's Keanu Reeves)

The other thing is that I found out yesterday that my son's father got that fucking shot!  I KNEW he was deceiving me about something and he confirmed that I actually knew over a month ago intuitively when I was asking myself what I was being deceived about.  It makes me so sad because I've heard so many things about how this "shot" is affecting people as well as that the white hats have had a hand in making the "shot" inert.  I don't know what to believe!  I have not taken the time to sort out what the truth is with all of it.  I'm sad for my son if he ends up losing his Dad over this.  

While I understand WHY he did it (making $$ over his own health) I'm still devastated.  I'm astonished at how much it's affecting me.  He is like family even though I have absolutely NO desire to be with him again.  He is the ONE person here, still in Boulder, that knows me better than anyone of my friends because we've known each other nearly 27 years!  That's hard to let go of.  I can tell him most anything and not give a shit what he thinks.  I can be cold, hard honest with him... I'm talking about tough love here; the kind of honesty that people don't necessarily WANT to hear but NEED to hear.

This is SO HARD!!!  I've been though moments where all I wanted to do was to go HOME (previous Star system) and I got through it and now I'm there again...

I don't hate people, however, I am so DONE with their ignorant BULLSHIT!! Their weak, spineless attitudes that keep them trapped in fear, ignorance and COMPLIANCE!  I feel like I'm living in two different worlds... I have one foot in 5D where I GET what's going on and WHY and then I still have to function in 3D where there are so many asleep sheep.  WTF!

I want (need) to break through the veil... I want (need) to remember who I REALLY AM.... I want to FEEL what it feels like to be home again (in the God Head).  

I'm so weary... to emotionally tired... and DONE.  I have so few people that I can REALLY talk to... I want my tribe back.  They are NOT here in Boulder.  Boulder got taken over by more spineless, ignorant people with $$ who think that moving to where the "grass is greener" will make it all better instead of taking their power back to change what needs to change where they were... (California)  We are overrun with people from Cali, NY and Texas.  

I can't blame people for wanting to leave.  Cali and NY are Democrat SHITHOLES!  But NOTHING will change until the people grow a FUCKING spine and stand up for their rights... and that's a laugh because clearly, they don't even know what they are... they're so conditioned to give in a little here and a little there... they are the frogs in the pot about to come to a boil... they are the sheep going over the cliff with the rest of the herd!  

I need a fucking BREAK!😠💪😣💔